Well some of you have asked why my weekend was so stressful and I can t write...
I'm so sorry you have to go through all this and especially on your birthday but any day. I grew up with a mother as an alcoholic. My grandmother was our savior. I don't rememer alot of things but I do remember my mother(she was never a mom) drinkiing and just staying in bed. Unfortunatly, she never did get any help and died when I was 10 of cirrous (sp) of the liver.
How old are your brother and sister? Do you have a dad in the picture.
Take one day or minute at a time. Your in my thoughts and prayers. Great Big Hugs......
Layloni - my sympathies. I just left my abusive alcoholic husband this past week. I understand your pain and if I can help in any way, please message me. It is a terribly personal thing, but I can assure you that it is much more common than you think...people just don't talk about it enough. Telling your mom what you did may have been the best thing you could ever have done for her. BE STRONG and LIVE YOUR LIFE!!! We've got one to live, sister!! Huge Hugs.
So sorry you had to deal with that. I didn't have alcohol issues, but had to deal with some metal instability from my mom. It is so hard to love unconditionally some times. You are so right that it is too stressful for you. You do need to think about yourself so you can stay healthy for your sister and brother. Hugs from me and I hope by some means your mother wakes up and realizes what she is doing and gets some help.
I'm not getting posts until several hours later...sorry. Layloni, big huge hugs. I am so sorry about all of this and I admire how you have overcome it and did not become an alcoholic or marry an alcoholic. My dad was an alcoholic and thankfully he stopped drinking a long time ago - but I married an alcoholic and thankfully he stopped drinking as well. But I went thru years of hell before he did. Neither of them drank to the point of being in bed for days on end tho. My dad and Gary both hald their jobs down, showed up for work everyday - but evenings and weekends were drunken stupers. I pray your mom stops drinking. Will she get some professional help? Will she go to AA?
Thank you everyone! My brother and baby sister are 12 and 4 and we don't have the same dad. My baby sister's dad who my mom is married to now like to also get drunk. I just don't know how I can be there for my baby sister and brother without causing any more pain. I don't want to take her away from them because she adores them and tries to protect them when anyone gets mad at them, or yells at them, but at the same time I don't want anything bad happening to either of them. It is all just way to hard and I can't take another sorry from my mom. She has used it way too much and has never stuck to her word :( she has been in and out of AA my whole life and has even gone to a rehab. I have asked her to go see a psychologist but she keeps saying that she can't afford it, and I have to agree with her. But I keep saying that she needs to get on Medical and that will pay for it. I'm running out of patients with both of them and I am tired of having to be the parent to my parents.
It's really hard because there are children in the home. I wish I knew what to say.
Thanks Cyndi! It is hard because the two little ones :(
I think so many of us can relate in some fashion. Just know we're here for you. I wish we could change an addict, but they have to want to change. Addiction is a strong disease, layloni...I'm sure your mom doesn't choose that over all of you though. She's just not as strong as you wish. Can you do an intervention and get her into rehab?
One last thing Layloni....if you really think the kids are in danger then it's your duty to intervene. If you think taking them is what is best then do it. Maybe the threat of it happening will wake up your mom and step dad into getting sober. But if it would be too much for you perhaps getting DCFS involved? Emotional scars can heal, but God forbid a physical danger happens to either one of them. I'm just thinking of my aunt and how she almost killed me twice with her drinking and driving. I wasn't even her daughter and went through hell, so I can only imagine what her kids (my cousins) went through. My gramps was an alcoholic as well. I thank God daily my mom is just a worry wart negative nancy. I am truly blessed to have her as a mom. My "dad"? Well, we won't go there LOL. Nothing more than a person I had to suffer by my whole life. No daughter feelings on my end that's for sure.
I also married an alcholic who is now sober. It must be so tough for you to watch your sister but that is all she knows. I went to a support group for people who live with or are affected by alcholics in any way and one of the most important things I learned is to say "no" and also not to take what he did personally. It really helped me alot. You cannot control anyone other than yourself.
Maybe if you can take your sister for weekends or something else she will see that there is more to life than drinking. I know it is hard to say but try not to stress. We all know what stress does. Hugs